Month: August 2019

5 Facts Science Says About Eating Right

Published on by The Five Minute Mind1 Comment

Written by Lea Riemeier

It’s common knowledge that giving a machine the right fuel is necessary for it to work at its best without collapsing. Our body is a machine too, but I’m wondering – why are we not making sure that it gets the best fuel too?

Many people nowadays do not believe that feeding our body right and healthy can actually have an impact on how we feel in general? But guess what – it does! Why else do many of us feel so crappy sometimes when we had fast food for a few days? “I don’t have time.” 

That is one of my ‘favourite’ excuses… You don’t have time to grab a piece of fruit or vegetable, but you have time to make a stop at McDonald’s Drive Through? 

I am not saying you should never eat fries again – hell no! It’s all about balance, isn’t it? Small changes can make a huge difference and it’s a start. If you want McDonald’s then get it, but if you’re just hungry and want a snack maybe you could try an apple or a banana instead? And you will see, they won’t kill you. Here are five facts on why healthy food can make you feel better or happier 🙂

  1. Eating fruits and vegetables increases people’s life satisfaction

A study from Australia from 2016 found that people who switched from eating almost no fruit or vegetables to including eight portions a day in their diets felt an overall increase in life satisfaction that is comparable to the feeling an unemployed person has after finding a job. Everyone knows studies that show an improvement in people’s health when they eat more fruits and veggies.

What I find interesting though is, that the effects it has on our life satisfaction seem to happen much faster.  

  1. Eating healthy prevents mood swings

We all know that feeling when we are really energy depleted and just need a quick snack to get that blood sugar up again. What’s a faster way than having a piece of chocolate or a candy bar?

Yeah, we will feel better for a bit, until the blood sugar drops down super fast because of how fast our body digest and absorbs these simple refined sugars and we will feel tired and crave more and the circle starts again.

There is nothing bad about sugar; it’s definitely the fastest source of energy. Just try combining it with fibres instead of having it by itself. Fibres are complex carbohydrates, found in fruits and vegetables, especially in the peel, but also in oats, peas, beans, etc.. The complex carbohydrates will slow down the sugar absorption into your bloodstream, will cause an increased release of Serotonin, the “feeling good” chemical and by that prevent these mood swings, which suck not only for you but also for the people around you.

  1. Feeling more comfortable in your skin

We all want to feel comfortable with our physical appearance, but nowadays that is hard for many of us.

On the one hand, there is all that influence from social media on how we should look like and on the other hand all these super fancy unhealthy food trends we all HAVE to try and take a cool photo of to post it on Instagram (No? It’s just us girls? Oh.).

I can’t tell you to not listen to that and it doesn’t matter what social media says and you are all beautiful as you are, because why would you believe me? You have no idea who I am. But what I can tell you is: ‘Listen to your body. It tells you what to do.’ If you don’t feel good in your own skin, because you are obese or you have bad skin then no one can help you, but YOU

You can make healthy food choices and you will see how it will make you feel better, look better and it will keep you motivated to make healthy choices in the future. 

Most change is slow and gradual but is entirely worthwhile. What matters more in the end? Social media and trying every food trend that already won’t matter anymore tomorrow or how happy you feel with yourself? 

  1. What you eat can improve your mood and energy levels

Many of us are having a hard time eating enough protein throughout the day. Most of our foods contain lots of carbohydrates and fats but they lack the amount of protein we should eat. Protein is great to improve your mood and energy even for several hours after eating. They slow down the absorption of carbohydrates into your bloodstream and increase the release of dopamine and norepinephrine, which are also used to treat depression.

Examples of protein-rich foods are:

  • Eggs
  • Chicken
  • Fish
  • Soybeans or tofu
  • Lentils
  • Quinoa
  • Nuts and seeds
  • Greek yogurt
  1. Keep those bowels moving

This might not be the nicest topic to talk about but whether we like it or not it’s important and everyone has to go to the toilet.

Nowadays many of us suffer from constipation and can’t empty ourselves regularly and that obviously makes us feel bad, bloated, and just somehow heavy. A very simple explanation of why we feel like that is that we are not getting enough water and fibres in our diets, which are the essentials for our gut system to work properly and get everything moving.

Once you’ve experienced how great it feels to have regular bowel movements, and how much lighter and comfortable you feel, you won’t ever want to feel differently and you’ll probably prioritize water and fibres.

Sources:

https://www.livescience.com/55407-eating-more-fruits-veggies-linked-with-life-satisfaction.html

https://www.healthline.com/health/mood-food-can-what-you-eat-affect-your-happiness#mood-foods

https://www.webmd.com/depression/features/foods-feel-better#1

https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/thumbnails/image/2019/07/18/15/istock-855098134.jpg?w968

Start With 5: Kanye Cracks the Post?

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment
Image result for person happy looking at list
Me (probably) in a couple decades

I have to say, coming up with these feelings is pretty fun. It makes it easier for me to notice them in every day life as they happen- not only making a mental note to appreciate it more, but also a note to jot it down here, in my… Journal? Diary? I think that’s basically what it is, but since I’m a millenial, I’m just going to go ahead and call it a blog.

5 Guys Burgers and Fries do fast food, but I do lists (and still can’t come up with a catchy title). Here’s 5 underrated feelings to continue your week.

1. When you drop your phone and you’re bracing for the worst, but you pick it up and it’s all good

Dropping your phone sucks, and no matter how careful and graceful you are, it’s going to happen. So when my phone makes a particularly long plunge towards the cold, hard earth and I turn it over and it’s unscathed, it really makes me sigh a heavy sigh of relief (I don’t know where the inspiration for Titanium, bullet-proof, or any other lyric Sia has about being unbreakable came from, but it definitely wasn’t an iPhone- so these moments are definitely appreciated)

Relatable


2. That first sip of coffee or tea in the morning

The initial taste of your hot drink of choice is good any morning, but it hits a little better on those mornings that are just a bit more of a struggle. I’m a tea guy myself, and that first sip is usually far too hot because I’m usually not patient enough to wait until it’s past its scalding phase. Hot drinks are meant to drink hot, so what if I burn my tastebuds off a little bit? Either way, my double dose of tea is one of my favourite things in my morning routine. Must be the British in me.

In case you were wondering, this is how you model sipping coffee

3. The ‘thank you’ wave of appreciation when you let someone merge in front of you

It’s the little things. When someone’s coming in and you’re a good sport and let them in, it’s a small token of gratitude to have them wave their appreciation. We’re all about manners in Canada (most times) and this is basically a must for drivers in the North. Bonus points for when that person is getting ignored by other impatient drivers and then you go on and save the day to let them in.

Can you imagine if we actually lived like stock images make us seem like?

4. Remembering a password first try for a site you don’t use that often

With the varying standards of what makes a password strong, you can’t even use the exact same password for every single site. So when I’m logging onto something I seldom use and I just throw some combination in, or one of my old passwords that I don’t use anymore and it works on the first try, I ignore the feeling that I’m sort of Oracle and just take a second to appreciate my wizardry.

You know what, I’m feeling these stock images. Let’s keep it going

5. Getting a text or call from a friend saying they were thinking of you

This one is the bee’s knees and can really go a long way to making your day, can’t it? Knowing you were on someone’s mind and mean enough to reach out to let them know that is a pretty good way of them letting you know you’re valued to them. It may not happen a whole lot, but it’s always appreciated when it happens and can make the heart feel a bit warmer. Since we’re all reading this anyway, I challenge myself and you to reach out to someone you haven’t heard from in a while and let them know you’re thinking of them- all the reasons of why it’s a nice gesture are all highlighted here so why not be the creator?

Comment who that text is definitely from.
P.S., I never thought I’d see the day that Kanye was on the site in any way. Anything is possible.

That’s all for this week. Use these buttons to share it how you feel and help this guy continue to build The Five You Need into a career- have a great week!

Why Is It Easier To Focus On Negative Things? And What Science Says To Fix It

Published on by The Five Minute Mind2 Comments

It doesn’t take a genius to explain that being happy is much more enjoyable than being miserable but, mirroring how complex the human mind is, true comprehension of happiness is the type of lifelong stuff that we may never fully figure out. Yet the nature of it, at least for me, is so interesting and worthy of study that I naturally feel compelled to learn more- and like the Rock on his “cheat day” from his rigourous diet, I’m hungry. 


As you already know, the world can be a pretty negative place. 

People that seem to enjoy sucking the energy out of places, internet trolls, and don’t even get me started on the news. Negativity breeds negativity, or so the saying goes, and for some reason or other, it just seems like we’re naturally able to listen easier to that negative voice, feeling, or person, more than the positive stuff.

Why?

One of my favourite authors, Harvard psychologist Shawn Achor, explains why we as humans just can’t help but be drawn to the negative stuff sometimes and how it’s just flat out easier to feel negativity than it is to feel happy (or else I’m sure that we all would just choose to be happy).

He basically says that way back in the day, like way, way back in the day, all that negativity was actually super helpful in keeping us alive. 

In early human times, the fella that walked around in the sun thinking about how great everything is was much more likely to get devoured by some sort of vicious predator or ignore other signs of danger, like say walking off a waterfall (I don’t know, I wasn’t there- you come up with a better example).

So as a result, those that were able to focus more on all the bad things that could be around them lived more and the others… Died. 

This repeated itself over and over until the genes of all those negative people who were pretty good at singing Bee Gee’s songs lived long enough to pass down the habit to their kids and the others either learned quick or didn’t get the chance to even have kids.

When it comes to survival, that stuff makes a lot of sense. But the reality is now that we don’t have any real threats that are hunting us down and trying to kill us each day.

Since we can’t just give the habit back to whoever gave it to us, we as humans have an innate proclivity towards sifting out all those negative messages from the good ones, as those are the ones that can do damage to us.

A huge example of this is the news. Why do they report such negative content all the time? The answer is simply because they’re doing what every business tries to do: give the people what they want, so they can make money from it.

People are just naturally more interested to read or hear about that homicide that happened the other day, or whatever else happened that was horrific in some way. The interest comes from the simple fact that we focus on it more subconsciously because our instincts make us feel like it could possibly threaten us in some way.

It doesn’t look like this type of media is going to change either, after a Russian news site decided to pump out only positivity for a week and lost two-thirds of its readership in one day. 

Anyone in charge of anything at a news company will undoubtedly avoid making the same mistake. For myself, I chose to unfollow any news outlet or source of breaking information because I simply realized that internalizing all of that negativity is likely influencing me far more than being ‘in the know’ about the horrors going on. 

I also figured that if something was big enough to actually impact me, I would almost certainly hear about it from other people– and I really don’t care if I’m the first to know.

Another idea Achor explains is that to counteract these negative messages it takes a considerable amount of effort. 

Since we are predisposed to focus more on bad things, it takes 3 positive messages to counteract 1 negative message. 

An example of this could be at work, or school, or wherever you spend the most time. Someone could tell you you’re doing a good job or give you another positive affirmation of some kind, but if the next person told you that you’re useless there, the message from that person who’s probably just taking out some of their own inner turmoil out on you would stick with you for far longer than the person who told you’re doing good work. 

We’d wonder what that guy’s deal was and likely begin questioning if he was right or what exactly he was meaning.

The same goes for the rest of the negative messages in the real world. Since we’re just instinctively more concerned about negative things, we grant them way more of our focus than the others. 

To balance this, seeking out those messages of positivity can help train our brains to see more of what we’d rather see and not what our instinctive brain thinks we want to see.

Pointing out areas of gratitude is a great way to plug this in- it can really start by taking a minute every day to think about all the things you’re grateful to have and that you’d be upset if you didn’t have. 

As we know in this world, anything can change at any minute and that thing you took for granted every day can be gone in a second.

Gratitude doesn’t have to be for all of the best things in your life either. Do you have eyes in your head right now to read this? Sweet, that’s pretty dope. 36 million people in the world aren’t so lucky. 

If you’re scrolling on a phone to read this, imagine how difficult your everyday life would be without it, and the opportunities and ease it affords you. You get the idea, and the examples are limitless.

One could even say those tiny little things that make you feel good for a moment, or longer, are worth giving more attention to, and we as privileged humans probably overlook them on a daily basis. 

As I’ve explained in this article, it’s not exactly our fault (we can blame the ancestors and their knack for surviving).

I started out a series a couple of weeks ago, and it literally just gives a shout out to those good feelings we’re all familiar with that might slip under our radars if we let them.

If you haven’t already, you can check them out here and here.

As always, thanks for reading and your help makes a big difference in the growth for The Five You Need. We’ve eclipsed over 2,500 followers across all platforms and I’m super grateful for that.

If you think anyone else might like to read about this study, you can send it to them directly with the buttons below.

The next goal is getting to 1,500 likes on the Facebook page (currently at 1,283). We’re almost there! Help a guy out and give some love to anything you see on Facebook from The Five You Need, it helps Facebook see that what the page is sharing is worth showing to more people. 

Thanks!


Sources:

  • Achor, S. (2010). The happiness advantage: The seven principles of positive psychology that fuel success and performance at work.
  • Achor, S. (2013). Before happiness: the 5 hidden keys to achieving success, spreading happiness, and sustaining positive change. First edition. New York: Crown Business.

Two Different Kinds of Friends, Are You Real or Fake?

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment

I find myself in Riga, Latvia in eastern Europe and while it’s similar to Canada with its northern disposition and affinity for hockey and basketball, the two countries are otherwise very unalike. Walking around my hometown in Canada would be met with the sights of relatively small buildings with modest heights and space, space for pretty much as far as the eye can see. Conversely, walking in Riga is thatched with sets of evenly parallel streets typical of downtown settings and buildings with fine carved, dated architecture expanding far above your head, built far beyond your time (or your grandparents for that matter). It’s a welcomed scene for a Canadian guy who is normally surrounded by the ever-expanding, but comparatively fresh buildings from home.

The differences don’t stop with the city and its surroundings of course, with cultural norms and behaviours following their own unwritten but established rules. To the outsider looking in, it might even seem like these people just aren’t as friendly, operating on their own wavelengths and at their own pace. Even my limited encounters with some locals had demonstrated their knack for being pretty blunt when something wasn’t funny, pronounced horribly wrong, or just plain stupid- all things I’m quite capable of in conversation, sometimes in bunches! Like when I tried to say a former Latvian NBA basketball players name just my second night here, which was met with a laugh and a comment about how brutal my pronunciation was…

Building from this, I was reading a book that serendipitously coincided with this area of Europe and shared the thoughts of a teacher on these differences, and explained by the author of the book (which was The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***, by Mark Manson- a great read on a healthy, productive mindset that’s worth checking out).

To summarize, the Russian teacher explained that the strong influences of socialism and communism felt by older generations had shaped the social behaviours of the people here (there is a heavy Russian influence in Latvia, and about 1 in 3 people are Russian). Basically, during these times in the mid 20th century, fear became a very real factor in the lives of the people and trust from one individual to another became one of the most valuable commodities. People became motivated to find individuals they could trust, and those who were trustworthy had more value to others, thus having a greater social gain. The teacher explained that the quickest way to build this was through blunt, honest, and genuine encounters in order to show this quality and gain the trust of the people around you.

Flip over to North-American culture and you see such a vast difference, where people often modify their behaviour to be liked more or present themselves differently at home, work, or otherwise. Capitalistic influences and making money and as much of it as you possibly can has seemingly motivated this difference, with people on a cultural level interested in changing how they act in order to maximize success in different ways. As a result, more people native to this continent are more prone to living in ways unauthentic to their true self, with these background influences of society ultimately playing a role in who they are as individuals.

While the first few instances of experiencing this firsthand were a bit of a shock, the timing of reading an explanation on why it’s like this was perfect. With this in mind now I find the difference pretty refreshing, and definitely something possible in learning from. It’s more typical here that what you see is what you get; if you just said something stupid or definitely, totally not their humour at all (ugh)- you’ll know about it. But when you hear something positive, it holds more weight because you know its true and not some BS that someone’s blowing up the back to make you feel better, or some sales pitch to make them seem like they have more value as a friend.

Just some things I found super interesting that got the wheels turning in thought and I’m sure there’s more to it- what do you think?

Leave a comment below or on Facebook!

5 Virtues Necessary For Every Friendship

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment

No matter how adept someone is at maintaining friendships, there will always be conflict. Despite these struggles, friendship and social interaction is a necessary part of human life, so understanding them better is a vitally important topic. Here are some research based approaches of making sure those around you accurately receive how you feel about them (with sources at the bottom).

1. Adding Value

Poor friends take more value than they give to another, while good friends add more value than they receive. Healthy relationships function best when the value each puts in is relatively equal, and without expectation. What is adding value? Adding value is anything that makes the another feel cared for, loved, and valued by the other. A simple method of someone showing the value of another person in their life is by checking in with how a person really feels or is doing. Beyond the basic nature of “how are you” and other formalities, checking in with how someone is truly doing is an essential form of love in the way of expressing genuine care. If this is common sense, great- applying it further and making a conscious effort to think of more ways to make someone know they’re valued to you is fantastic and still underused in many relationships.

2. Empathy

This articles contents are all interrelated to each other, and empathy is a tool to better understand the people around you. By making an effort to see and understand what another person may be feeling about something is a great way to not only gain motivation for helping them, but also to understand the best way to help them out. The old saying of “putting yourself in someone else’s shoes” is the basis of this idea and, aside from the overused cliche, it still rings true in dealing with not only your friends, but with anyone you come in contact with. It is much more difficult to be consumed with negative emotions such as anger and frustration with someone when you have a truly empathetic standpoint on why they might be doing what they’re doing. In addition, developing a strong, empathetic perspective has been shown to increase investment, as well as genuine care in others success.

3. Honesty and Being Authentic

Being honest and authentic is a no-brainer, but to expand on it further, openness and honesty is also relevant apart from just ‘telling the truth’. There are hundreds of interactions where people suppress their genuine feelings on something for fear of being rude, hurting someones feelings, or otherwise. For example, in Canadian culture (God bless our maple-syrup-loving souls), there are many cultural norms around being polite and friendly to one another. This is great and doesn’t need a remedy; the only time this becomes a problem is when someone avoids telling another person what that they need to hear, or pretending everything is terrific when it really isn’t. This can hamper someone else’s growth as well as create resentments from within that result from expressing a form of inauthentic behaviour. In other words, if you have to be someone you’re not, say something you wouldn’t say, or pretend to be happy and fantastic, research shows that it will take a toll on your own mental well-being. Being authentic and letting your true self show is easier and beneficial to yourself, as well as the people around you.

4. Communication

As mentioned earlier, these points are connected and this one stems from above. Knowing how to effectively communicate with someone else as well as knowing the right time to is important in making sure the message is received in the right context and in the right state. On top of this, communicating from a perspective of empathy can help make sure that the other person knows it’s coming from a place of love; strengthening the overall message.

5. Committing to Happiness

There’s a mass movement behind loving yourself and putting yourself first. While this is important, it should not take away from investing in your friendships by committing to someones else’s happiness. When someone commits to another’s happiness and they put it ahead of the friendship, they make a decision to do things that are best for the other person despite if it’s uncomfortable. For example, holding someone accountable can be tough and unpleasant, but is necessary to benefit them in the long run. Loving yourself and loving your friends are not mutually exclusive ideas, meaning they should be done together.

Leave a comment below or on Facebook on what you think is missing.

Photos from Elbsandsteingebirge (top), and Bastei Bridge (above) Germany
ReferencesLavner, J. A., Karney, B. R., & Bradbury, T. N. (2016). Does Couples’ Communication Predict Marital Satisfaction, or Does Marital Satisfaction Predict Communication?. Journal of marriage and the family, 78(3), 680–694. doi:10.1111/jomf.12301

Valuing empathy and emotional intelligence in health leadership: a study of empathy, leadership behaviour and outcome effectiveness. (2005). Health Services Management Research, 18(1), 1–12. https://doi.org/10.1258/0951484053051924

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happiness-in-world/201002/what-makes-true-friend

The Power of Perspective: How to Come Out Better Off From Adversity

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment

‘ll tell you one thing: when it comes to physical growth, it’s something I picked up on super quickly- not that I had a choice. Evidenced by a constant rotation of new clothes, cramming into cars, or straight up hitting my head on low ceilings and door frames, rapid growth was just a part of my life.

However, what I’m most interested in lately is the other side- the mental side. Growth in that area is much less obvious, yet more important. To be willing to change and adapt to what is around is an ability that serves each person, and specifically the mindset around that and problems that arise can feel like a make or break in dealing with it all.

In other words, how we see challenges and adversity will determine the ability to overcome them when they come around.

And just like everything else, it’s a habit.

I’ve read some interesting things lately that support the claims that how we interpret a problem or obstacle influences how we’ll be able to actually get through it, and how we’ll be left afterwards. This is where growth comes into play. Adversity is always going to be tough, clearly as it’s in the definition itself. But when a challenge presents itself, however harmful, draining, or distressing it is, looking at it from a point that’s determined to see an opportunity to grow changes how we move through it- and what we’re left with when it passes.

This school of thought is based off of viewing adversity through two sets of goggles. One of these lenses show a struggle as something debilitating, hampering and a source of stress. The other shows a landscape from the bottom up littered with rationalization of ways this will help benefit some aspect, or promote growth in some way.

This is similar in the motivational mantras we see from time to time that preach the importance of failure and how it’s necessary before success. It’s from the same branch of perspective and requires the same mentality. The only difference with this is that it’s applicable into everyday life and the struggles that present themselves. Big or small, the philosophy remains the same.

Psychology supports this by offering that we have two routes when presented with adversity (small challenges all the way up to immense ones), and that’s growth or trauma. Framing things from the former perspective enables us with this ability to become better, smarter, stronger- whatever we wholeheartedly believe is possible. This isn’t my own idea, rather something I was drawn to and am now reiterating to go along with my own insights.

Science tells us that this concept of belief in growth over trauma is possible with anything. I’m not disparaging or taking away from the horrors that some people go through, because sometimes it’s beyond difficult and overwhelming. My two cents on the matter is mainly that plugging in this habit first with minor challenges repetitively, and often, can help put us in the position to do so when the bigger problems come along. Every person is a bundle of their own habits, and making a frequent effort to reason what all of the positive benefits the not-so-positive things bring can shape how we feel during adversity, and what we’re left with when it passes.

Reverting back to the motivational cliches, if Michael Jordan being cut from the varsity team was seen from the traumatic lens, we might never have known the now-household name. If Dr. Seuss had seen each rejection from children’s publication companies as a sign to quit, we might not have seen his world of fantasy and art.

Brainstorming all the different, intricate ways that any certain challenge can push you forward, strengthen you, or make you wiser helps growth while also showing just how possible moving beyond the struggle is.

Starting small seems to help with me, making those a habit before tackling the major stuff.

These are just my thoughts and I’d love to hear yours- feel free to comment or write a message. Also liking and sharing content is always a huge help, thanks for the support!

Start With 5: What Feelings Do You Overlook?

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment

I’m feeling something good coming. Not only is this series super fun to write, I feel like it’s some of my better work, and the responses have been great. The best part about it all 

is that I get to write straight off the cuff, providing a voice for the thoughts tapping around my head. In case you missed it, here is the first piece where I describe some 
super underrated feelings that probably get overlooked. This is purely just about giving some well-deserved appreciation to feelings that just slip right past our radar sometimes.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s Mambo Number 5*(*underrated feelings)

1. That ‘AHA!’ moment you finally remember the word that’s on the tip of your tongue

It’s like a floodlight that surges with power before the huge shine of light and man, does that ever feel good. The longer you spend wrestling over what simple little word was on the tip of your tongue, the greater the rush pumping through your veins momentarily. Am I exaggerating this a little? Maybe, but when this happens to me I am way too excited for a second and I’m hoping there’s at least a few other people who can relate. Who knows, maybe this will be the best parts of my day when I’m much older and wiser yet still approaching senility. As an old man, I’ll make a point to still get fired up when it takes me a little too long to remember what I ate for breakfast, but I remembered nonetheless.

2. When you find a new song and instantly fall in love with it

I might be just impressing my own personal pump up package with these feelings, but here’s another thing that gets me jazzed up (not a bad pun, but certainly a welcomed coincidence). I cycle through music pretty quickly and pretty regularly, yet finding new songs with HEAT are still few and far between for the most part. When you find that song with some fire though, those first few listens are like an audio-espresso in the ear-drum. I then listen to them until the wheels fall off and then wonder why I have a tendency to just way over-do things. I guess that’s why I can’t have nice things.

3. Not being allergic to peanut butter

Man oh man, if you are reading this and you are allergic to peanut butter, I am so sorry. That creamy, peanut-y goodness is just different- healthy, tasty, and addicting. I probably slap way too much of it on my little pieces of toast, but it’s only to keep me from just eating it straight from the tub. If you don’t think peanut butter is that big of a deal, I bet if you couldn’t eat it for the rest of your life you’d miss at least a little bit (and if you still can’t agree to that, then maybe go eat some more Brussels sprouts or whatever else you’re probably into, I don’t know).

4. Driving past a cop and then almost freaking out because you realize you’re cruising a little too fast, but it’s all good because he’s in a good (or lazy) mood

So going back to number 2, finding that new tune can lead to number 4- and that stroke of luck followed by a wave of relief is a pretty good feeling. It happens, sometimes you just don’t realize you’re into that zoom zoom mode and when your friendly neighbourhood police guy let’s you off the hook it feels pretty good, doesn’t it?

5. When you wake up wondrously rested and ready to go

As an avid sleep fanatic, let me just start this by saying that this doesn’t happen a whole lot for me, so when it does, it’s a pretty special feeling. Sometimes I ruin it by going right back to sleep, but sometimes I get up feeling pretty charged up for the day. It definitely helps when you have some good stuff to look forward to, but either way when this miracle happens I do not take it for granted.

*Photo to illustrate that even when I wake up energized, I’m still a baby*

That’s it for this week. Using one of these buttons down below would make me a happy guy, mainly because I had to figure out a bit of coding just to add them. Let me be the first to tell you, that stuff is not easy. Have a good week!

Have a feeling that fits the topic? Maybe I’m overlooking it- comment it below or send me a message and I’ll feature it!

Start With 5: Do You Let These Feelings Slip?

Published on by The Five Minute Mind4 Comments
I’m feeling something good coming. Not only is this series super fun to write, I feel like it’s some of my better work, and the responses have been great. The best part about it all is that I get to write straight off the cuff, providing a voice for the thoughts tapping around my head. In case you missed it, here is the first piece where I describe some super underrated feelings that probably get overlooked. This is purely just about giving some well-deserved appreciation to feelings that just slip right past our radar sometimes.

Ladies and gentlemen, it’s Mambo Number 5*
(*underrated feelings)

1. That ‘AHA!’ moment you finally remember the word that’s on the tip of your tongue

It’s like a floodlight that surges with power before the huge shine of light and man, does that ever feel good. The longer you spend wrestling over what simple little word was on the tip of your tongue, the greater the rush pumping through your veins momentarily. Am I exaggerating this a little? Maybe, but when this happens to me I am way too excited for a second and I’m hoping there’s at least a few other people who can relate. Who knows, maybe this will be the best parts of my day when I’m much older and wiser yet still approaching senility. As an old man, I’ll make a point to still get fired up when it takes me a little too long to remember what I ate for breakfast, but I remembered nonetheless.

2. When you find a new song and instantly fall in love with it

I might be just impressing my own personal pump up package with these feelings, but here’s another thing that gets me jazzed up (not a bad pun, but certainly a welcomed coincidence). I cycle through music pretty quickly and pretty regularly, yet finding new songs with HEAT are still few and far between for the most part. When you find that song with some fire though, those first few listens are like an audio-espresso in the ear-drum. I then listen to them until the wheels fall off and then wonder why I have a tendency to just way over-do things. I guess that’s why I can’t have nice things.

3. Not being allergic to peanut butter

Man oh man, if you are reading this and you are allergic to peanut butter, I am so sorry. That creamy, peanut-y goodness is just different- healthy, tasty, and addicting. I probably slap way too much of it on my little pieces of toast, but it’s only to keep me from just eating it straight from the tub. If you don’t think peanut butter is that big of a deal, I bet if you couldn’t eat it for the rest of your life you’d miss at least a little bit (and if you still can’t agree to that, then maybe go eat some more Brussels sprouts or whatever else you’re probably into, I don’t know).

4. Driving past a cop and then almost freaking out because you realize you’re cruising a little too fast, but it’s all good because he’s in a good (or lazy) mood

So going back to number 2, finding that new tune can lead to number 4- and that stroke of luck followed by a wave of relief is a pretty good feeling. It happens, sometimes you just don’t realize you’re into that zoom zoom mode and when your friendly neighbourhood police guy let’s you off the hook it feels pretty good, doesn’t it?

5. When you wake up wondrously rested and ready to go

As an avid sleep fanatic, let me just start this by saying that this doesn’t happen a whole lot for me, so when it does, it’s a pretty special feeling. Sometimes I ruin it by going right back to sleep, but sometimes I get up feeling pretty charged up for the day. It definitely helps when you have some good stuff to look forward to, but either way when this miracle happens I do not take it for granted.

*Photo to illustrate that even when I wake up energized, I’m still a baby*

That’s it for this week. Using one of these buttons down below would make me a happy guy, mainly because I had to figure out a bit of coding just to add them. Let me be the first to tell you, that stuff is not easy. Have a good week!

Have a feeling that fits the topic? Maybe I’m overlooking it- comment it below or send me a message and I’ll feature it!

Start With 5: Have You Overlooked These Feelings?

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment

Officially reaching the last month of summer really makes you wonder where the time went, and how it just keeps getting faster and faster. Since time won’t wait for anyone, taking time to appreciate moments as they happen and even in reflection helps lets us savour the flavours as they constantly come and go. Savouring’s the name of the game here for this series, where each week I’ll be sharing 5 things that just made me feel some good kind of way- maybe you’re familiar with the feelings.

1. That feeling when you finish an overdue or challenging task

It’s Saturday morning, first day of the long weekend, and I wake up and just take a look around and it’s like I’m seeing my house for the first time with brand-new eyes.

We’re living like slobs, and since I have the day off I figure enough’s enough. I blast music through out the house to get the juices flowing and power clean the house in some sort of weird, focused determination (with the begrudging help of my visiting little brother, who did his absolute best to seem enthusiastic- kudos to him).

After I was done, I literally stood there with my hands on my hips, just stuck in a power pose for a minute with some major BDE (if you’re not familiar with the term, let me just substitute it for ‘confidence’ before you go looking it up…). Man, that felt good. The cleaning itself was nothing to celebrate, but that feeling after was great. I kind of just started cleaning to tidy up a bit, but once I got rolling it really did feel great and the moment of accomplishment after was nothing to take for granted.

2. When the sun comes out from being behind a cloud

Simple but pleasant, being outside when it’s not sweltering hot is much nicer with the company of a warm sun. I was sitting outside and subconsciously had the expectation that there would be no sun, so when it peeked out and shone down, it felt reeeeaaaal nice.


3. That moment of excitement and anticipation near the end of a game

 If you’re not a huge fan of sports, maybe you should just mosey on to number four.

Okay cool, it’s just us now. How sick is that end-of-game rush when the score is just a little to close for comfort? I was at the Calgary Stampeders football game with my little brother (shout-out to the sister for the tickets) and the game took that surprise turn with the other team making an unlikely run during the final minute of the game. There’s nothing like the energy of live sports when the game is close. Looking over to see my little brother not just on the edge of his seat, but standing on it, was enough to emphatically illustrate that it wasn’t just me going wild with anticipation. The game ended on the final play, with the loser-other-team only inches away from stealing the game.


4. Sitting down after a long day

 After a long day, especially one with walking or activity, plopping down on the couch knowing everything is done is a great feeling. I find this to work especially better when you have a brother to grab some snacks and the remote for you (camp Big Brother isn’t free, you know).

It just doesn’t feel the same after doing nothing

5. Hearing some thoughtful comments from someone you care about

My friends and I like to think we’re pretty insightful cats sometimes, and when we have a group dinner we’ve been known to talk about things we’re grateful for, or what we like about one another. It’s not a bad way to boost the day, and hearing my guest, my brother participate and deliver some comments straight from the heart really made my night, in combination with him being a part of something like this for the first time. Now in the first year of being a teenager, we’re starting to see our relationship deepen and I’m stoked for it.

The little bro and I at the game

That was my five, what’s a feeling you were happy for this week? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

5 Virtues Necessary In Every Friendship

Published on by The Five Minute MindLeave a comment

No matter how adept someone is at maintaining friendships, there will always be conflict. Despite these struggles, friendship and social interaction is a necessary part of human life, so understanding them better is a vitally important topic. Here are some research based approaches of making sure those around you accurately receive how you feel about them (with sources at the bottom).

1. Adding Value

Poor friends take more value than they give to another, while good friends add more value than they receive. Healthy relationships function best when the value each puts in is relatively equal, and without expectation. What is adding value? Adding value is anything that makes the another feel cared for, loved, and valued by the other. A simple method of someone showing the value of another person in their life is by checking in with how a person really feels or is doing. Beyond the basic nature of “how are you” and other formalities, checking in with how someone is truly doing is an essential form of love in the way of expressing genuine care. If this is common sense, great- applying it further and making a conscious effort to think of more ways to make someone know they’re valued to you is fantastic and still underused in many relationships.

2. Empathy

This articles contents are all interrelated to each other, and empathy is a tool to better understand the people around you. By making an effort to see and understand what another person may be feeling about something is a great way to not only gain motivation for helping them, but also to understand the best way to help them out. The old saying of “putting yourself in someone else’s shoes” is the basis of this idea and, aside from the overused cliche, it still rings true in dealing with not only your friends, but with anyone you come in contact with. It is much more difficult to be consumed with negative emotions such as anger and frustration with someone when you have a truly empathetic standpoint on why they might be doing what they’re doing. In addition, developing a strong, empathetic perspective has been shown to increase investment, as well as genuine care in others success.

3. Honesty and Being Authentic

Being honest and authentic is a no-brainer, but to expand on it further, openness and honesty is also relevant apart from just ‘telling the truth’. There are hundreds of interactions where people suppress their genuine feelings on something for fear of being rude, hurting someones feelings, or otherwise. For example, in Canadian culture (God bless our maple-syrup-loving souls), there are many cultural norms around being polite and friendly to one another. This is great and doesn’t need a remedy; the only time this becomes a problem is when someone avoids telling another person what that they need to hear, or pretending everything is terrific when it really isn’t. This can hamper someone else’s growth as well as create resentments from within that result from expressing a form of inauthentic behaviour. In other words, if you have to be someone you’re not, say something you wouldn’t say, or pretend to be happy and fantastic, research shows that it will take a toll on your own mental well-being. Being authentic and letting your true self show is easier and beneficial to yourself, as well as the people around you.

4. Communication

As mentioned earlier, these points are connected and this one stems from above. Knowing how to effectively communicate with someone else as well as knowing the right time to is important in making sure the message is received in the right context and in the right state. On top of this, communicating from a perspective of empathy can help make sure that the other person knows it’s coming from a place of love; strengthening the overall message.

5. Committing to Happiness

There’s a mass movement behind loving yourself and putting yourself first. While this is important, it should not take away from investing in your friendships by committing to someones else’s happiness. When someone commits to another’s happiness and they put it ahead of the friendship, they make a decision to do things that are best for the other person despite if it’s uncomfortable. For example, holding someone accountable can be tough and unpleasant, but is necessary to benefit them in the long run. Loving yourself and loving your friends are not mutually exclusive ideas, meaning they should be done together.

Leave a comment below or on Facebook on what you think is missing.

Photos from Elbsandsteingebirge (top), and Bastei Bridge (above) Germany

#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; } /* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block. We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */

References

Lavner, J. A., Karney, B. R., & Bradbury, T. N. (2016). Does Couples’ Communication Predict Marital Satisfaction, or Does Marital Satisfaction Predict Communication?. Journal of marriage and the family, 78(3), 680–694. doi:10.1111/jomf.12301

Valuing empathy and emotional intelligence in health leadership: a study of empathy, leadership behaviour and outcome effectiveness. (2005). Health Services Management Research, 18(1), 1–12. https://doi.org/10.1258/0951484053051924

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happiness-in-world/201002/what-makes-true-friend

Subscribe to our mailing list

* indicates required
Email Address *
First Name
Last Name

(function($) {window.fnames = new Array(); window.ftypes = new Array();fnames[0]=’EMAIL’;ftypes[0]=’email’;fnames[1]=’FNAME’;ftypes[1]=’text’;fnames[2]=’LNAME’;ftypes[2]=’text’;}(jQuery));var $mcj = jQuery.noConflict(true);