Author: The Five Minute Mind

The Past Will Haunt You And The Future Can Destroy You, If You Let It

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Aside from maybe when I was a kid, times where I’m truly ‘in the moment’ are rare for me.

And honestly, up until a couple weeks ago, I was entirely ignorant of it and what it was doing to me. Sure, I’ve heard endless clichés about “living in the moment” and cherishing the time you have in the present, but I had become so desensitized that they were left at just that: clichés.

Call it ignorance, call it whatever you want; the fact is that I was obsessing over the past and thinking too much about the future. Apart from the fact that this completely robbed me of the whole, complete, enjoyment in most of what I was doing, the effects it had on my mind are clear.

Depressive moods, like sadness and regret, have an intricately dependent relationship with the past. Basically, sadness is caused by something that has happened at some point in our past- fresh and recent, or long ago. These two sister-like characteristics of sadness and the past rely on each other, coexisting. They share the fact that neither really thrive without the other. If you feel sadness, especially regret, it is because of something that has already happened- not something impending and coming soon. An easy way I found to look at it objectively was to think about how I feel after leaving a holiday, or a vacation of some sort. Naturally, I’m a little bummed because the glow is over and in the past- everything else in life is not much different.

Now you may be thinking of how you can be sad about something in the future, however it is a different quality found there.

Anxiety is based on fear about the future, and this fear (like it’s cousin, sadness) is also entirely dependent on the concept of the future. You simply can’t be anxious about something in the past, because it is done. Therefore, it is this other, futuristic side of the spectrum that hold this pair of correlated concepts. Another way to look at it is the excitement I feel before the glory of the incredible vacation mentioned earlier, as excitement and anxiety are so closely related emotionally that they can be viewed in the same sense. It is this excitement that is brought on solely by the anticipation of an event coming in the future.

Sadness is caused from an event of our past while anxiety looms from something in our future.

This may seem like common sense, but the reality is that most of us (and myself, without a doubt) aren’t aware of it, which means we can’t really counter it properly.

The truth is that my habit of living in the future and always thinking 5 steps ahead of myself was giving me anxieties that I wouldn’t have had I put my mind in a better place to enjoy the moment.
In short, I was always thinking about my next move, the next part of my day, and what was to come after whatever I was doing currently.

Like I mentioned earlier, this also affects the satisfaction of experiencing the moment, and I was making things way less enjoyable for myself.

If you’ve ever been surrounded in the bliss of a warm summer vacation, you likely know exactly what it’s like to be lounging in the sun, maybe on a beach or by some water- with not a thing to do or worry about except relaxing and enjoying every second. There’s a whole host of other factors that contribute to these habits, like my cellphone and busy mentality.

Just like any other group of habits, there are ways to replace them with better ones.

Focusing on engaging your senses is the bees-knees when trying to stay in the moment. Concentrating on things you can see, feel, hear, taste, and smell is exactly what helps to keep you anchored in the present. Sounds so simple, right? Unfortunately, with technology and all it’s progresses, this becomes increasingly more difficult. The human mind is more engaged than ever before, thanks to these cellular ‘joys’ of innovation, so being mindful of the moments that make up your life gets harder and harder. The effect that being present in each moment you experience does wonders for your own mental health, so taking time to realize it’s importance daily can really reinforce the good feelings of psychological tranquility- which always seem to increasingly more elusive as the stresses and negativities in life pile up.

Just spreading a friendly service reminder of something most people know somewhere within themselves, in order to help keep what matters most at the forefront. As for me, I’m trying to get better at living fresh- and passing along my thoughts in the meantime.

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Love Will Not Work Without These 3 Things

Published on by The Five Minute Mind1 Comment

What a week! After spending time vacationing in beautiful, British Columbia (and giving myself a quick concussion on the way…), I’m filled with inspiration to write about something that I myself have little experience in: love. I’m not a married man, nor some guru of romance, so naturally the inspiration came from two of the sweetest people who find themselves nestled into Nelson, B.C..
Grandma and Gramps have lived in a little honey-hole on the lake for almost 25 years, and have been together happily and successfully for 52 years. I’ve known them for over a decade now, but spending time in their home as they hosted myself and some of my friends (and their grandson of course) allowed me to get to know them a little more intimately then I had previously.

As someone who doesn’t even know what my next week looks like, to see people who have managed 52 years in the company of one another is something I can’t even begin to fathom- but after talking to them I begin to understand.

Grandma and I walk out in to the garden, flowers and plants surrounding the borders of the property, only ending for the expanse of the deep blue that is the lake.

Yeah, the Kootenay lake is their backyard. Gentle mountains cozied around the lake finish off the view that happens to be their every day view.

We take a seat, and I mention to Grandma about why I wanted to talk to her. I explain that I was taken aback to see a happy, vibrant love between two people who have spent more than double the time together than I have spent on the earth, and that I was eager to find out how she makes it work.

For anyone that knows Grandma, the joy and energy that bubbles out of her is always apparent and this surely doesn’t change for our conversation. She immediately begins talking about her main man, and how important he is to her.

The love and compassion she so evidently possesses for the love of her life is visible in far more than her words; when looking at her mannerisms and body language it’s easy to see that this is easy to talk about.

After talking to her, I wrote down the pillars that hold up her love, relationship, and marriage.

1. Love and most of it’s success is hinged on you and how you govern yourself within it to foster growth.

The first of what I gather while talking to her corrects a way I had been thinking up until this point. In my comparatively miniscule experience, I had been under the impression that finding the right partner was 99 percent of the battle. Quickly after talking to Grandma, I come to realize that this isn’t quite right. How we act, how we respond, and how we behave play a tremendous role in the success of our relationships- and is something we will always be able to control.

2. Patience, and understanding how important this is in your relationship is crucial.

“We all think differently, we’re on different levels.” Realizing that there will be struggles, and that not every day is roses is key. Much like the hours of winding roads endured to get to the mountains required patience, love requires patience and endurance.

3. Being mindful and willing to communicate, while also understanding the importance of it.

Everyone knows how to communicate when they need something badly, but understanding the importance of talking about things is essential. Much of the time it’s external factors, like our egos, or emotions that prevent us from communicating in the right way. Mostly everyone knows that talking is good, but simply being mindful of how important it is, combined with a willingness to talk about things in the right way go a long way.

. . .

One profound aspect explained to me by Grandma is the nature of how dynamic and changing we as people are. We will always be changing, and having a willingness to grow and change together is an ingredient of success in a partnership. Being adaptable is a terrific quality, and factoring in someone else and how they may change is amazing. Growth is a motivating concept, and the thought of growing alongside someone else, in sync is extremely attractive.

As we sit on the bench swing, the compassion that radiates from her is immense. Time and time again she stresses how important Grandpa is to her, yet even without her repeating these comments, they are found subliminally in virtually everything she says. 

I thank her for sitting down to chat with me and she hurries off to continue her day- only stopping to give Gramps a quick kiss as she passes by.

Gramps with the proudest catch of his life, and a fish

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I Took A Whooping From An Eleven Year Old, And It Won’t Be My Last…

Published on by The Five Minute Mind3 Comments

With the game tied up and two points away from being decided, I look at my opponent in front of me and know in myself that it’s game time.

He drives around me, crossing over before scooping the ball through the hoop while going off the opposite foot.

Okay, one more point and my game is over. This is fine though, I’ve been here before.

I pass him the ball for the final, game deciding possession, and he dribbles and crosses over to attempt a similar move- only this time he sneaks around to the other side for a reverse lay-up, gently spinning the ball off the backboard and through the hoop.

Before shock even has time to fully sink in, the loudest squeal of joy can be heard from him as he runs off the backyard court and into the house faster than I can even make words come out of my mouth.

My eleven-year-old little brother Austin just beat me one on one for the first time.

I stand there a moment, wondering how I got myself into this position before walking up to the house to find my brothers animation is somehow filled with more excitement and emotion then when the Warriors won the NBA championship less than a month prior.

As someone that means the world to me, seeing the joy on his face somehow lessens the competitive blow my ego just took, and I sit there and accept his energetic elation without making excuses in front of my bewildered family.

This kid has shown day in and day out uncanny similarities between us, and the gratitude I have for him is immeasurable. While we aren’t identical, looking at him and seeing qualities evident from our brotherhood is something I cherish and hold close to me. I know that through him, I can walk along life beside him and find solace in the fact that I can support him through struggles and challenges I faced at the same ages.

For better or for worse, my brother emulates me and this is something that I will never take lightly. I love the relationship and how complacency is no where to be found, because of how highly improvement is viewed by both of us. Life and growing up brings many mistakes accompanied by lessons, and to be frank, the plentiful mistakes I’ve made have thankfully afforded me with countless lessons- and the age gap between Austin and myself means that I have the luxury of helping him through similar times.

The awareness of this fills me with happiness and relaxes me, while also adding another dimension of fulfilment to my life that helps validate my worth. My internal compassion develops by helping him, because making a habit of putting someone else first is a humbling element of selflessness that can grow into other areas of my life. For as much as I’m helping him, I truly believe he’s helping me. 

I’ve talked a lot about gratitude in previous posts, and how this magnifies when talking about living, breathing, people in your life is immense and should never be taken for granted. Having appreciation for those around you is one of the most important vehicles of your own wellbeing. Assuming someone will be there regardless of what happens is an easy trap to fall into, and in doing so it robs you of truly appreciating them and what they’re worth. Taking time to fully value and appreciate the people around you will ensure that you’re always spreading the compassion you need to the people you need most. While obviously this element of gratitude is consistent with all members of my family, this post is for Austin and this feat he managed on his birthday.

Pretty soon he won’t be proud of beating his big brother in a game of one on one, so maybe I should be the one cherishing the moment!

Congratulations, Austin. I love you buddy.

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What I Saw While Dirtbiking Around the Coast in the Philippines

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I was driving a dirt bike up a sandy coastal road in the Philippines when I look over and see a clearing just below, with a cluster of shacks with mud for floors and enough for maybe the basics of living. There’s not a chance that there’s power in the huts, and as I look to the left I see a woman washing what looks like children’s clothes in a basket.

My glance is met with a glowing smile, and a wave.

I kind of feel like a jerk because the amount of concentration and balance needed to manoeuvre the bike through the slippery, sandy, dirt hill is enough to make me sweaty, and because of this I can’t return the gesture.



The wheels I took around the island

Over to the right are kids running around and playing together, and sounds of laughter are heard throughout the little pasture of dwellings.
No phones, no roads, no appliances- all of them living more minimal than most people in North America do when they’re camping.

But no happiness? It’s infectious and found mostly everywhere you look. While riding on past, all I see are people smiling, socializing, and truly seeming to be content with the moment they are in right now.

You might think that this is something atypical, lucky, or even rare- but that’s just not the case over here. While I didn’t have the luxury of time to travel the country entirely, all of the places I did go had the same thing in common.

These people truly epitomize happiness and connectedness. The former concept is joyful, but the way these people value communion and social interaction is admirable. Each individual can attest to the way they feel connected to those around them, and the results are living right in front of you. While a vast majority of people from the Western world would view this minimalist lifestyle as torturous and unpleasant, the people here who are immersed in this way of life are living a life with tremendous gratitude for what they have, and who they have.

In the same way that Western culture has placed an importance on capitalism and making money to be successful, this little region of Pacific culture has cultivated a priority on community. The proof is in our backyard too: Filipino’s have created their own communities and do a pretty good job of orchestrating groups and leagues by which they can all gather together with.

I think it’s amazing. To have a culture so warmly embrace togetherness is inspiring, and the results can speak for themselves. The social structures connecting everyone are found everywhere, and the sense of community is unparalleled in our culture. We live in a world where all of us feel like there’s always something we need to be happy, perpetually seeking the next thing and the next dollar.

“Once I can afford that car, then I’ll definitely be happy.”

This goes on and on forever, steadily keeping pace with you and the next thing you want, only resulting in endless dissatisfaction.

Learning to be happy with what you have, and letting gratitude be at the forefront of your life will pay you the biggest dividends. The Happiness Advantage is an eye-opening book that truly instigated this paradigm shift in me, and the fact that is the one I chose to bring with me to read while travelling through the Philippines is astoundingly coincidental- and to this day, still blows my mind. One of the main themes of this book is the concept that money and success will bring you happiness, when in reality it’s not true. Constant hunger for more stems from this, and happiness will always elude you as you race towards the illusional rainbow.

Instead, the truth is that happiness is what fuels success, and focusing on your own happiness will actually make you more creative, motivated, and energetic.

My belief is that adding gratitude into the equation will compound this even further, because allowing your happiness to rely on what you already have rather than what you want is the key to being in love with the moment and the life you are submersed in.

For me personally, the proof is in the country and culture I was lucky enough to experience overseas. This was the main trait that was consistently found; people wrapped up in gratitude for what they have and the community around them.

Allowing yourself to let your motivation come from happiness rather than “more” is the rewarding experience you deserve, and what ends up happening when you become happier is amazing. Everyone deserves to be more motivated and energetic, and the byproducts of these two qualities will naturally bring you more. There’s nothing wrong with getting more, it’s simply the prioritization of acquiring more that is counter-productive, and will end up making you less happy. This ends up causing a chain reaction, in turn making you less motivated, with less energy, while your creativity dwindles. It’s a vicious cycle, but adjusting this to be centred around happiness allows you to snowball in the direction you want- naturally attracting more and more to you instead.

It starts with the little things; smiling at people, holding the door for someone, or even waving at someone.

Unless you’re biking up a steep hill.

If you’d like to give The Happiness Advantage a read, scroll down to the bottom of the page.

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How Having The Wrong Mindset Will Kill You

Published on by The Five Minute Mind8 Comments

The human mind is crazy, and the things it’s capable of really blow me away. Having the right mindset when looking at the intimidatingly mountainous task of making something of yourself is everything; failing to do so can keep you stuck standing still. I myself used to be quite the negative guy, justifying my pessimism by attributing it to only being ‘realistic’.

“Being realistic is the most commonly travelled road to mediocrity.”

I came across this quote the other day from the legendary Will Smith, long since my favourite celebrity since he showed the world how fresh being a prince in a rich suburb really was. First, I took these words in for what they are and internalized them. Second, I posted about it to contribute to Will Smith Wednesday (it’s a real thing, and I shouldn’t even be surprised that the internet beat me to the punch on this one).

If you follow this stud through out his career, you can see just how relentlessly hard he works in order to get to where he is- and I’ve also always admired how he never hides from his emotions or feelings, regardless of what it might make people think. As being honest and vulnerable with yourself has been a pretty big theme lately, you can see why this is a big deal.

But it made me think about placebo and how well-documented it is about how much tricking the mind can really do. From things such as people feeling stronger and more balanced when they put a rubber band on their wrist, to people literally being exposed to stuff they’re allergic to and feeling nothing because they took a pill to supposedly ‘counteract’ their allergy (when it was nothing but a capsule of sugar).

Seriously, even studies were done on placebo trials with dogs suffering from epilepsy, and found that both control groups of dogs reacted positively to the medication- and again, one group of pills was nothing. I’m still trying to wrap my head around that one, but great news for the pups.

So what does that mean for us? When I heard about stuff like this I felt a burning desire to harness this in some way to really maximize what I’m capable of, plus those around me.

If someone came from the future, gave you some irrefutable evidence that they were in fact straight out of the future and McFlyin’ back only to let you know how wildly successful you were about to become in a few years- would you believe them?

This drives me wild. If there was undeniable evidence of something so definite and concrete about how we are going to achieve everything you’ve ever wanted to achieve, you have no other choice but to believe it. Making this change in your mind opens pathways in your head, and your brain sets out to work on routing the journey between where you are, and where you are told you are going.

If this sounds crazy to you- good.

But believe it or not, the visionaries and monumental innovators in this world all started as bright-eyed students of life, planning their moves that would soon change the world. Don’t think for a second that these people did not possess a grande, elaborate visual of what was to come. Thinking and visualizing all of the intricacies and tiny details about what you want out of yourself and your life is the biggest step you can take to start hiking towards that mental picture. From being the CEO of some outlandish company to fully taking control of your own happiness, whatever you want most is yours.

Allowing yourself to see the finished product before you’re done is like building a puzzle and having some of the pieces around the border put together, making it easier because you’re able to visualize the puzzle completed and whole.

Why would your dreams be any different?

Thinking for success is the first step, but it is still nothing without knowing. Converting this belief into a rock-solid knowledge is necessary and removes the doubts in your mind that might end up slowing you down. You need to let your mind know how possible what you’re doing is before you’re able to see solutions and actions to get you closer to your goal. If you think something simply cannot be done, you immediately shut down a huge chunk of your mind’s power generators that can be utilized to produce solutions to obstacles in your way. Your mind will not be creative in seeking out an answer for something you’ve already taped off as impossible. Why would it?

“I can create whatever I want to create.”

Another piece of gold from Will, and I encourage you to check out the engine underneath the hood of the people that inspire you most. Understanding what makes these people tick can shed some light on how you can help yourself improve.

And for placebo- be that friend around everyone that’s always feeding people heaps of positivity. If you’re able to tell people what they’re good at, the simple reality is that they will truly become better at it. I would say to keep things realistic, but studies have even shown how placebos still work even when the group knows they are taking a placebo. This means that even when people know that the medication or aid is completely fake, it still makes them do better than the people without it.  If that doesn’t tell you to always believe in yourself, I don’t know what will.

Now I’ll ask again: if someone all-knowing could tell you how wildly successful and happy you will be in the future, would you believe them?

Why can’t it be you?

Chucking Yourself Out Of A Plane Might Be One Of The Best Things You Can Do For Your Friends

Published on by The Five Minute Mind2 Comments

Another day, another article on friendship. But with something as important as this, inspirations are plentiful, meaningful and found all around.

The reality is that all of us stand to better ourselves a bit within the relationships we find ourselves surrounded by. Some people seek to better themselves in creating friendships, others with maintaining them- and every thing possible in between.

As a progression from of my previous articles (about vulnerability, honesty, and value), ways in which to deepen the bonds between those close to you is a natural and attractive step forward. Plus, the idea came from another very close friend- a huge inspiration!

Having a deeper connection in your friendships is wonderful and allows you to connect with people in ways that needed for the very survival of our emotional wellbeing. Knowing how to do this with people can be a tricky task, and is something people naturally progress to slowly over time. But what if you could expand the depths of all of your friends? Could you become closer to everyone, hand in hand increasing your own emotional socialization and maximizing your own growth?

Without question, this is something I relish in my life. The friendships I have entrenched myself in account for the growth I’ve been able to achieve as a person, as well as all of the memories and stories I’ll be able to tell on a porch someday to make myself sound interesting.

The world craves meaningful relationships and the evidence is found in the multitude of different social structures. People crave socialization whether they realize it or not. Holiday parties, bars, office functions- you name it, and they all boil down to assisting people’s basic needs for socialization.

Alcohol is a cheap representative of people and they’re desire to bond. In some cases, alcohol is a commonplace instigator of socialization and fuel for friendships. People are drawn to how easy making friendships are without any social thoughts or anxieties that prevent them from sharing themselves honestly to people they normally wouldn’t.

Not going to lie, it’s such an easy social trap to fall into.

Unfortunately with alcohol, once the drinking is done and the day is new, most often the bond does not carry over quite the same. The bond that was bought for a night is usually exchanged back for the inhibitions that were missing while the night was alive and wild. I’m sure almost anyone can look back on someone they talked to while drinking and then wonder why on earth you were telling a stranger about stuff that would make a good episode if you ever wanted to be featured on Dr. Phil. Or hey, maybe that’s just me.

Alternatively, sharing intimate experiences with someone else will always deepen the connection you share with someone. People often think of it as a concept that flows only in one direction- yet this is wrong. It’s a common misconception that to share these profound experiences with someone you must be very close with them, but I don’t agree. A person can share experiences with someone else they aren’t as close with, subsequently enhancing the intimacy between those two people.

For example, when my mother (a sensible woman) decided it would be a good idea (it was) to pay for me to throw myself out of an airplane for a milestone birthday, just being lumped together with the few people taking on the encounter at the same time was enough to spark conversation after and feel a faster connection than the stereotypical, ‘it feels forced’ conversation with the person behind you at the supermarket. Now if I were to have utilized it with a friend comfortable enough to join me on this, us sharing this experience would elevate our friendship high off of the ground (accidental but welcomed pun).

Have you ever noticed that people just seem friendlier when you’re on a tour or vacation of some sort? Of course, the elevated happiness and friendliness from just being on holiday definitely plays into it, but the common ground of a significant experience you’re sharing is also a factor.

In short, pursuing opportunities where you can share an meaningful experience with someone will make it easier to increase the intimacy of your friendship. Remaining stagnant as friends and being mired in a routine of things that never change will provide a barrier between friendships, and simply being conscious of it allows for a better chance of proactivity and change. Step out of your comfort zone, and search out those opportunities for growth.

Stepping outside of your comfort zone is probably the biggest, albeit toughest, next step. Even the phrase sounds like the verbal equivalent to getting out from a warm blanket to step onto the brisk floor and colder air of your room. However, just like the latter is needed to head to work or school, the former is also needed to gain the most out of life- and for this example, your relationships. In a previous article about vulnerability, taking the plunge is an idea mentioned to enhance a friendship. This is the tougher, less illustrious concept that takes a little more guts.

Something embedded in my friendships is the notion of shamelessness. Whether it’s making sure everyone gets a hug on arrival for one of our annual guys reunion (yeah, we’re grown men and we like to hug, so what?), or offering our thoughts unfiltered, as they come, removing the element of shame just allows you an easier path to be free in who you are with everyone around you. Be shameless in the way you approach your friends, the way you communicate with them, and the way you let them know you care. Take the first step by offering a piece of vulnerability by which those around you can build on, and watch the seeds you plant grow.

 Many people remain chained by inhibitions preventing them from expressing their true thoughts and feelings, and appearing free yourself shows others how possible it is to step away from theirs. This ultimately rewards you and the person you share this side to. The important thing to enable this is to understand why someone is reluctant to be real, and encouraging them by being vulnerable and real yourself.

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This Expert Explains The Essentials of Taking Care of Yourself

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Last week I had the chance to chat with Jackie Boyd, an expert in the field of holistic health and wellbeing at Boyd’s Alternative Health.  The knowledge she brings to the table of wellness is a valuable asset to The Five You Need. Jackie is a devoted wife, mother, and successful business owner who was able to grow her passion into a living whilst also positively impacting the lives around her. She is known by all as a charismatic, supportive person and I am incredibly thankful for the time she was able to lend me.

Below are some of the highlights of the interview and at the bottom is full audio of the conversation!

Jordan: I’ve known you for over a decade now, but if you could introduce yourself and explain a little bit about what it is you do?

Jackie: I’ve known you for over ten years. I myself have 4 kids. I’m a mom, I’m a wife. As a job I’m a holistic practitioner, I have had a business on our property here for 18 years.

Jordan: So health is the biggest theme here obviously.

Jackie: Yep! What ends up being the most prominent thing in the majority of people is their emotional health, and unfortunately there’s no pill for that. So we can help people along the way, I think it’s very important.

Jordan: That’s something that resonates with me, as this endeavour that I’ve set out on is predicated on emotional wellbeing and mental health. It’s become just as prominent as physical injuries and I think they needed to be treated the same way.

Jackie: It’s actually become more prevalent. It’s amazing to incorporate emotional health as well as physical health.

Jordan: So where does wellness and wellbeing fit into your life, how are you proactive in fitting it into your life?

Jackie: It has to be your life. You can’t choose it now and again. It starts with food, if you don’t fuel your body with real food, you can’t expect it to continue to do what you want it to do for all your years. I’ve preached this to my kids, you, I’m sure your coaches have preached it- it has to start there [with your team of people]. When I talk about a team of people, after food I believe I believe it takes a team. My chiropractor, massage therapist, an acupuncturist, and even though it might sound vain- my hairdresser. Those are the people who help my world go round.

Jordan: Wellbeing is not just an option, on the side, this is something that has to 100% at the forefront of your life- it’s a lifestyle.

Jackie: It is a lifestyle. If you don’t live this lifestyle you have to choose to make the changes, and that is a choice. In order to truly have that well-rounded mental health, it has to become a lifestyle. Everyone has a struggle, mine is fitting in time for exercise. You don’t have to have this massive routine though, even getting outside and getting some fresh air- nothing clears your head quite like that.

Jordan: I agree. Would you agree that the societal stigma around mental health (and wellness) is changing? You see this type of stuff all the time, do you think these concepts of wellbeing are popularizing?

Jackie: I believe it is popularizing. I guess the downside is that we want to believe that it is becoming more acceptable to look at getting help- it’s still stigmatized. I think we need to change that. I often hear “Well everyone’s got a problem.” Partially that’s true. And if you’re waiting to have a perfect life, that’s never going to happen. But there’s always going to be somebody that uses that problem to their advantage.

Jordan: So in your eyes, we’ve made a couple steps but there’s still a lot of work to be done.

Jackie: Yep. I see people in our clinic and I would say about 80% of them struggle with emotional pain of some sort. Every one of us are going to have emotional struggles- thats just life. It’s the types of stress that we just can’t get our own grip on that we need to learn how to handle. I have a different approach with a lot of people [which is] the diet we’ve created for ourselves- that’s the start of so many problems.

Jordan: One of the things that I’ve always loved about your field of expertise is how you tie in the interplay between physical health and emotional wellbeing. A lot of the time with other professions it’s seen as either or and there’s people who treat physical ailments and then others who treat emotional unrests but I live how a lot of what you do to can be for both. You stress how the two are interrelated and play together.

Jackie: Absolutely; always.

Jordan: As an expert in your field, what is something you can pass on that is unique to your field?

(Jackie humbly attempts to deflect the ‘expert’ moniker here, but as an 18 year veteran in holistic health, I don’t buy it)

Jackie: Self-care is caring enough about yourself to make the changes that you haven’t made to make yourself feel better. Just about the food, the team around you, and really learning to accept yourself. There’s so many things that go into self-care.

Jordan: Those are very valuable words. Well thank you for your time Jackie, and I’m super grateful you were able to take time out of your morning and talk to me to today.

Jackie: You’re welcome, I really like what you’re doing Jordan. It’s an interesting read!

Boyd’s Alternative Health is located on Highway 9, east of Beiseker. Jackie is an experienced alternative health practitioner who beautifully ties in the importance of physical and mental wellbeing into her practices. For more information on any of the products or services she offers, call Jackie at  (403) 947-2389

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Millennials Might Not Be Working, But This Is What Is

Published on by The Five Minute Mind5 Comments

Millennials are constantly being scrutinized for being lazy, entitled, and “ruining the economy.”

And they are. If 319 selfies in an Amaro filter can’t dig the economy out of debt… Honestly I don’t know what will.

Criticizing the generations following after you is nothing new and is sure to be a torch passed onwards as millenials start harping on the up-and-coming young bucks and
whatever ridiculous behaviour they normalize next. Let’s be honest, everyone can already feel themselves in those shoes as well. Although I strongly doubt anyone will be able to rock those all-white New Balances with the same zestiness, I’m sure they’ll be okay.


Community is a surprising, albeit subtle, trait found in each generation amongst themselves, as the simple timing of when you were born unifies people together by sharing similar experiences- however marginal it might be.

All generations have definitely cemented their own stereotypes, as the relatively harmless flack taken from each generations shortcomings can often be found on Facebook from time to time (as well as memed responses). Really though- supporting a household on a hardware store salary just isn’t feasible anymore, and sometimes it takes humour to send a message!

There are plenty of positive aspects put forth by the millennial generation; one of them being the main theme of The Five You Need. Wellbeing and self-care has often been overlooked for years by a massive chunk of the population, but modernization has helped to impress the importance of taking care and looking after yourself.

This is huge, as continuously overlooking an issue like this will only perpetuate the problem. While not prioritized or neglected in the past, self-care has become a societal norm. Realizing the merit in concepts like mindfulness and mental wellbeing have only just begun in the way it’s exploding in both popularity and value. This is a philosophy that should continue to be progressed by every generation, as anybody is susceptible in developing mental illnesses of all variations and magnitude.

No one is immune, and your mind should be treated with the same respect which we treat our bodies with. Self-care can come in a variety of ways, but understanding the primary role it plays in our lives is crucial to our own wellbeing.

As briefly alluded to in previous articles, being in tune with yourself is a big thing. Being conscious of the activities and habits that are both healthy and enjoyable to you is a base block to understanding how to take care of yourself. Whether that’s being outdoors, reading, or spending time with someone- being aware of how these activities help you stay balanced is key. This is relatively easy, but for most people the hard part is actually making time for these types of things.

Here’s the reality though.

The fact is absolutely everyone on this planet has time for a minimum of 15 minutes every day to spend on themselves- it doesn’t matter how busy you are. What is really at the forefront when someone claims they don’t have this seemingly insignificant block of time is that they just don’t care about it enough.

If that’s the case, okay. Some people are just geared differently than others. But an interesting way I learned to portray things accurately in your mind and to others is rewording common phrases to display the real truth. In this example, “I just don’t have the time for that,” is replaced with “It’s not a priority to me.”

Simple enough, but responding this way to yourself and to others can enlighten you on how you really feel about certain things. Going to the gym, meditating, eating healthy- whatever it is, this is the truth behind it. If it’s enough of a priority to you, you’ll make time for it.

The same goes for less rewarding activities, like watching TV or playing games. Motivated people who possess that natural pizazz for life say they just don’t have the time for those things, when in reality they just don’t place much of a priority on them.

Allow yourself to be honest with yourself and others, and see if that makes you feel differently about things. It’s harder to admit that eating better isn’t a priority to you than it is to say you don’t have time for it.

Being honest with yourself can help you plan out your days better and allow you to create the time necessary for the things truly important to you. 

This is a step in the direction of taking care of yourself, and in the end, all the dividends are paid out to you.

How I Tied Male Rompers Into Honesty In Friendships

Published on by The Five Minute Mind6 Comments

The bonds we have with the people around us are the most important part of our emotional wellbeing- which is why this article will be about another concept in friendship.

How a person exposes themselves emotionally to someone completely influences the nature of the friendship they share. When you think about it, it’s sort of common sense- the people you share more with are likely people you are closer with. 
However, there’s an element further that is significantly important yet not consistent in many relationships. The way we confide in someone is not just vital to an intimate friendship, but is crucial to our own emotional wellbeing. Being able to speak to someone about your own state of life and everything in it is absolutely necessary, and this is fortunately afforded to most people. People share things about themselves in all magnitudes, from elementary thoughts all the way to the intimate depths of feelings. Bringing this importance to the forefront of our friendships is key in building friendships as well as maintaining individual strength within our emotions. While this may be easier for some, and perhaps more difficult for others, realizing its significance reaps multi-dimensional benefits that simply can’t be overlooked. In summary, placing a priority on being vulnerable in confiding in someone is necessary for the friendship, but is also necessary for emotional wellbeing. This is a skill women are typically more proficient at than men, with unfortunate forces like toxic masculinity stopping more men from sharing their feelings. This means that with habits and mindfulness around it, it can still be developed further by both males and females. The stigma is gone from a man needing to be a nonvocal, emotionally bottled type. If male rompers are making way onto the fashion scene, being comfortable with talking candidly about whats on your mind to a close friend is easily achievable. It’s possible that women come about this easier, but it still doesn’t mean that this can’t be pushed to progress this skill set and be comfortable in talking honestly about what’s going on in your head. The liberation that this brings is indescribably freeing.
The next piece to this puzzle is honesty. This is a concept that means something to absolutely everyone, regardless of who you are. The reality is everyone has things that they either choose to leave out or alter in order to appease the people who listen. In other words, people either change the truth entirely or keep things to themselves because of the way they think people will react to the truth. 
This fear is infectious to our habits, and as with any habit, it can grow and become easier and easier to do until it is a trait embedded in our social structures. 
I’m entirely, one-hundred-and-ten-percent guilty of this. I spend so much time focusing on awareness of the feelings around me that I leave certain pieces of my feelings out of conversations in order to improve the way it’s received. Just like any self-reflection I’ve had, I decided to challenge myself by exposing honesty in its entirety to those closest to me. And it’s because of those feelings that followed this by which the second part of this article was inspired by. The freedom and self-comfortability brought by being honest with my own emotions, feelings, and words are difficult to express; sheerly by the magnitude in which it positively impacted me. Challenge yourself to allow someone in on a version of yourself that is purely honest and unfiltered with everything you say. If you already share this with someone, expand on it by including this habit with other people you’re close to. The way that this can positively infect the friendships around you is invaluable and can’t be fully quantified into words. The contagious nature of honesty and genuineness will only strengthen the relationship, and the liberation within your own mind that accompanies it is a coveted, incredibly positive byproduct. Take the plunge, and get comfortable with challenging yourself. Your friendships stand to miss out on too much otherwise, and regardless of that you owe it to yourself to be free.
The main idea for this topic came from a close friend, and I thank you for the inspiration.
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Keeping People Around Depends on This

Published on by The Five Minute Mind4 Comments

Finding anything truly lasting is difficult, and unfortunately sometimes friendships are this way too. Bonds and relationships with others are craved by every one of us; holding onto them can sometimes be a tall task. While by nature humans crave socialization and a sense of community, sometimes the comforting feeling of love and support isn’t consistent. These inconsistencies can be due to friendships changing like seasons, or from a colder isolation of the feeling of loneliness. If you disagree, you are likely blessed in the strength of the relationships that surround you. This article may affirm these feelings within you and perhaps bring a consciousness of the ideas to follow. 

If socialization and warm relationships seem elusive (and a little bit more of a struggle) this piece is about the importance of developing and fostering friendships in a positive way to maintain deeper, more lasting bonds.

The basis of my emotional knowledge for this area in my life is the people that surround me. I have been fortunate enough to be surrounded by people who genuinely care about the wellbeing of others- and this is a big head start. While new people have entered my life, the core of my friends have been consistent in my life for many years. I refuse to attribute this completely to luck or circumstance. Conflicting locations has never impeded these bonds, nor has any other factor that usually forces friendships to fade. There are characteristic constants found in these relationships that are a true driving force behind maintaining meaningful friendships. The first of these is value. This word typically springs thoughts of deals, sales or something like the good ol’ Value Picks menu at McDonald’s. As great as a Jr. Chicken is, friendships are probably worth more. The definition of value is “the regard that something is held to deserve importance, worth, or usefulness.” 

This might seem like a no-brainer, but instilling value into the people around you is one of the most important aspects of friendship. 
Doing this means two dimensions: putting value into someones life that you care about, and knowing that someone respects you enough to return the favour. This doesn’t mean eye-for-an-eye, or keeping score of any sort. Rather just being mindful of toxic habits that have no place in friendships, and mutual respects for people as individuals. This is easily identifiable. If someones level of respect indicates you lack importance or worth, this means value is absent. 
What is most important to realize is how crucial putting value into other people is, and how positively it affects you and the people that surround you. Value is as simple as showing someone you care, in whatever way comes natural to you. I’ve found that younger friendships and people find themselves in a balancing act with this, because showing someone you care about them can sometimes be difficult as it leaves you vulnerable. With emotional maturity comes the understanding that this is not an issue, and showing empathy and warmth become more natural and thus more present in longer friendships. 
If you find yourself struggling with some friendships, challenge yourself to making a real effort into adding value into other peoples lives without expecting it to be returned- the humility that builds from this is also rewarding.
What I’ve found in my own personal metamorphosis from a child into an adult is exactly this; value is everything. At younger stages in my life confidence was something that came more naturally to me, and some people around me would be very quick (and right) to say this sometimes came across as arrogance. In fact, those reading right now are probably questioning why “sometimes” is even in that sentence. And while many of my friendships were forged in this time, the reason they’ve lasted is because of emotional maturity and value. What I’ve noticed over this time is the sheer difference in support around me. Being full of yourself might make you a friend or two, but the difference of how these people support you once you add true value to them is incredible. Huh, imagine that- I found that being less of a d-bag increased my overall support network. Crazy. 
The reality is that while so many of these concepts are blatantly obvious, not taking the time to reflect on things allows them to slip away. 
How I began to add value to the people around me was by identifying a strength in myself and utilizing it to my advantage. Personally, I have confidence in my ability to display empathy, and show others I care by talking and listening to them (a trait no doubt learned from my mother, I can not sing higher praises for that woman). Understanding your own uniqueness and your own talents is key when assessing what it is you can bring to the table. If you can’t think of anything, your own self-concept is getting in the way- trust that you are capable and that you are valuable. Once you’ve got it, apply it into your life and become aware of how positive the dynamic of your friendships change.
The final part is coming to terms with how important it is to show the people in your life how much they mean to you, and how valuable they really are. Holding this in only damages your relationship and the other person involved. Showing them they care might also relieve them of any anxieties they have about showing you how much they care about you too! So text them first, hug them when you see them, listen to what’s going on in their lives- the only thing you have to lose is a more meaningful bond.

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